Mona Lisa's Smile

Why is it that every time I go to buy a new toothbrush, there seems to be a mass shortage? Literally, empty rows of preventative dental care instruments. I want to stave off gingivitis as much as the next person, but I don’t feel the need to by a 5 pack in order to do so? Are people not brushing anymore, is there not a sufficient demand for dental hygiene products that warrants keeping the shelves full? Or is it the exact opposite? Is it possible that people are going on toothbrush buying rampages in order to combat cavities that seem to be more prominent due to the consumption of our exorbitantly sugar-laden food? Are people trashing their toothbrushes every couple of weeks? No comprendo.

It’s not just the same store either. I've tried Wal-mart, Target, Rite-Aid, CVS…..nada. I mean, they have some, but  the pickins are pretty slim. Is there some crisis that I’m unaware of? Even if there were, would stocking up on toothbrushes be necessary? I don’t know what the logic there would be, but if I were going to weather a nuclear holocaust, the furthest thought from my mind would be dreading the idea of having to use the same toothbrush for more than 90 days.

Look, I’m a reasonable guy, and a laid back consumer. I don’t ask for much besides new and innovative, self sustaining, or recyclable products that have practical uses and make my life easier, but it’s not like I need a toothbrush that hovers over my sink and tells me that I’m late for work, or that I’ve missed a spot. I just want a plain old freaking toothbrush in a non- feminine color, without some radical maze of protruding rubber bristles diligently waiting to massage my gums. Simple and easy.  Geesh.